An Offer He Can’t Refuse…

“Be a man.” “A guy’s guy.” “BRO!”

There are these ‘man myths’ about what a guy is supposed to be, do and say. But, the Modern Man – we’re different. We are truly our own men. (Mostly, anyway.)

One of the tropes we see often are movies: “You aren’t a man unless you’ve seen (insert title).” The Godfather, Field of Dreams, Die Hard, Rocky, Shawshank, Caddy Shack, Reservoir Dogs, Braveheart, Rambo, even The Expendables … the list goes on and on.

I’ve seen all of those listed above. But, when I recently asked my Facebook “hive” to give me their top “Guy” movie that you HAVE to see, there were quite a few I haven’t seen – and no, I’m not sorry.

I’m my own man. I don’t like the beach, I hate standing in line for the “good pizza” and no, I don’t sit on the couch all day, every Sunday to watch all the football games. I do my own thing.

So, why haven’t I seen some of these ‘classic’ guy movies? Let’s dive in.

I know the famous scene clips. I know “Say hello to my little friend!” But a movie with a lot of guns and cocaine – never intrigued me. Even today, there is nothing about what I’m told or read about this movie that has me at all interested. Drugs have never been of interest to me in movies – not the fight for them or the comedic use of them. Which leads me to…

Most Judd Apatow/Seth Rogan Movies
See above. I don’t get drug humor. It’s not funny to me. Thus, a comedy based on it? Yeah – not gonna laugh at that one.

I’m not going to lie – I’m not even sure what it’s about. It’s DeNiro and Pesci doing their gangster thing, right? I saw Godfather, I saw Goodfellas* – is this one any different?

*Funny Story about Goodfellas

Years ago, I went through a phase of wanting to watch all the “CLASSIC” movies. I bought a book of some critic’s top 1001 movies and started making my way through them via Netflix’s DVD program. I saw awesome movies such as Bridge on the River Kwai, Citizen Kane and more. I got Goodfellas (with a lot of pressure from a buddy) and popped it in the DVD player.

I couldn’t believe how little the movie focused on setting up the story and how quickly one of the main characters was killed off. I was stunned. I was also shocked at how short the movie was. I ejected the DVD and was ready to move on to the next one…

That’s when I noticed it – it was a 2-sided DVD. Remember those? I had only watched the SECOND half of Goodfellas! So, I remedied the situation and can now say I’ve seen Goodfellas 1.5 times.

I HATE being scared and I’m not really a Sci-Fi guy.

I know, I know – I’m such a huge Star Wars fan, how do I not like Sci-Fi? You can fight me about that later.

But no, I never watched any of the Alien movies.

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly
Don’t shoot me, but I haven’t seen nearly enough Westerns. I don’t have a good excuse, I just haven’t. And no, before you ask – I haven’t seen any of the Dirty Harry movies either. Nothing against Clint – I just never had the desire.

There were more on the list that I have seen:
Spies Like Us, The Natural, The Patriot, Rounders, Predator, Bachelor Party, Usual Suspects, Gettysburg, Gladiator.

Some I would put on the list that no one said:
Rudy, Miracle, Outsiders, Karate Kid, Tombstone, Indiana Jones, The Three Amigos, Tommy Boy, Raging Bull, and the aforementioned Bridge on the River Kwai.

And even more I haven’t seen:
Patton, Full Metal Jacket, John Wick, Commando, Ronin, Heartbreak Ridge, Animal House

Which of these should I make sure I see? Any you really feel I should see just cause it’s THAT GOOD?

The list from Facebook was so varied – it shows that it really depends on who the “guy” is answering the question.

Where do you stand? What does your inner man love to watch?

– KP

P.S. Not sure what it says about me – but I’ll ALWAYS stop to watch That Thing You Do.

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